Well let's see where to begin....
my hair is blue, i have a piercing and I'm seriously thinking about ending my high school year right now and taking a free year. So let's start from the begging........I dyed my hair blue for the first time 30.10.11 and the next day i re-bleached it to add some pink and yellow. It was pretty awesome. Now i have blue hair with slight light-green places because my hair isn't evenly bleached :(. My dad was Ok but my mom was rather shocked....lol. So on 20.11.11. i did my first real piercing (not ears) on to my lover lip, and because of that i almost blacked-out ~.~ I'm happy that it's OK now and i can soon make the other one to so i can have my snake bites, not just a single piercing. Same night i did mine Ness did her other pierc. so now she has snake bites. She is luckier than me and doesn't have to hide them from her parents -.- I wish my parents would approve them as easily. Oh and if it wasn't clear we did our pierc. our selves. Ness's mom gave us some medicine to numb our lips before doing the piercings. At first we hoped that we didn't have to use the syringe, but after some testing we injected it to our lips. It numbed the skin in a second. Next day, after school i bought a new barbel for the piercing to replace the playboy bunny one Ness gave me -.-
And now before i move on to more serious themes let me talk about our little dysfunctional family :D
Almost 2 weeks ago Ness and Niji started hosting two guys from Tallinn. So almost every time i go there, we star a small/huge party that usually lasts until 3 or 4 a.m...almost every time we have school on next day :D The y guys are pretty fun and friendly but they have some serious raging' problems xD Last week when i re-dyed my hair we decided to play Baila *themostawesomedrinkinggameever* but we didn't have the cards...so while Niji was doing my hair, me and one of the boys made the cards :D We played two rounds and in the end of that night one of us was puking her guts out....*notme* So our dysfunctional family is Ness, Niji, two guys from Tallinn and me, and when i say dysfunctional then i really mean it :|
The serious part of this post is following right now...
I've been absent for some time from school land my parents don't like it. I can see why they don't and I'm not saying anything. Last week my mom told me about idea given to her by one of her fellow teachers. She told me that i could try applying to some exchange student program and leave for a year so when i come back i can start new. I really like that idea but some times i think that maybe i should just drop out and move to our old house that stands empty in the middle of a forest. My dad wouldn't have to pay the rent of my apartment in Tartu and i could watch the old house and start renovating it. The only bad thing about that plan is my pride, actually more my parents pride. I don't want them to be ashamed of me in front of their friends or relatives. I want what every child wants, i want to make them proud and happy, so they can talk good things about me and not lies. I know that if i continue with high school right now it won't get better, not for me and neither for them. I would slip and get bad grades, my dad would worry and his heart would fail, but that's the thing I'm most afraid of. I'm so afraid of loosing him, he doesn't know how much he means for me and i just can't imagine my life without him. He is maybe even the only man i ever love(i love him as a father). I know that i should just start going to school normally and get good grades but that is just not who i am. I can't change that and sadly my parents doesn't want to understand that. They think I'm just lazy and shit but actually there is much more that they could ever know.
And that takes me to where am i now, sitting on bed and trying to think what to do with my life. I have to make the decision that will probably affect not only my life but theirs also. Why can't just get a work as someone i want to be and be done with this school crap...the idea sounds almost easy ~.~
Until I'm alive. Yours sincerely: InsincereBlack
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